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Will Obama’s Victory Affect Attitudes Toward Interracial Dating?
The people of the United States made history Tuesday night by electing our first biracial President, but will that victory bring change to the world of interracial dating?
A couple of days ago I was talking with my parents about this topic. Bear in mind that my parents are Kansas born and bred and in their mid-late 60s. Though now registered Democrats, both were raised Republican and only recently changed their alliance. I would describe them as conservative, middle of the road Democrats. My dad is retired. My mom is a Parish Ministry Associate at their local Lutheran church in a very conservative town of just over 3,000 people.
I asked their opinion. What they said surprised me a little. They said, basically, that already no one really cares; that race in relationships doesn’t matter. That from the heart of Kansas.
Attitudes toward interracial dating have already changed. Many people, including yours truly, will tell you that, when choosing a potential partner, they don’t see color; they simply see a man. What is important is his character, his values, his personality.
On PBS’ Online News Hour, Andrew Kohut of The Pew Research Center said this:
I’ll give you an example of this. In 1987, for the first time, I asked a question about, “How do you feel about interracial dating?” Fifty-five percent of the white people that we questioned said they disapproved. That number has slowly come down every year. It’s only at 14 percent.
It’s largely because the generations that have come of age since 1987 and those that have passed have different attitudes toward race and, therefore, our political discussions are less animated by race.
What he’s saying is that race in our relationships, whether they be with a mate or with our president, isn’t as important these days. Pretty much the same thing my parents said.
And yet, I recognize that attitudes vary not only among people, but also according to location. We are still living with racism and prejudice. To deny that would be absurd even given Obama’s victory.
So what about those families are still living in the past and believe that each should “stick to their own kind” or those living in parts of the deep South where Confederacy is still revered? Will Barack’s election affect interracial dating in those circumstances?
The answer is possibly. We have proved as a country that we are more open-minded than we were 14 years ago, but on an individual basis there may very well be a difference.
Take for example, the strong black woman who loves black men and disapproves of black men dating white women. Her stance comes from a love of her culture and a desire to keep it pure. Though she may feel pride and even elation at the election results, I’m not sure that it will change her views on interracial dating.
As I’ve written before, sometimes women date interracially for different reasons. Some out of a sort of rebellion, a kind of forbidden fruit thing. Some of us are just equal opportunity daters who don’t see color. Whether a man is black, brown, purple, or poka dotted, it’s about the man rather than the color.
So, will having biracial president change that? Mo Rocca questioned:
If Obama wins, will we see an explosion of interracial dating and marriage? Will we see black parents and white parents encourage their children to date and marry each other in the hope of producing biracial grandkids — a tribute to our new president. Or will some fearful white parents discourage their kids from dating non-whites? If so, will this only egg on the white kids to sample the forbidden?
I’m not sure we’ll see much of a change in attitude. I think those of us who are okay with interracial dating will continue to think it’s okay. I don’t think the election of a biracial president will ultimately persuade those who believe otherwise,
Thoughts?
See what other people are thinking about this topic, and watch this space as other insightful posts are published.
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Will November 6th, 2008, 6:35 am
Tonight, I watched the BBC News. Brits were contemplating the possibility of a black PM one day. The World is all a-buzz, rightly so.
Attitudes which were embedded early on in life are difficult to change (those who are resistant to change, in general, would have a lot of
passion about keeping things as they are)
Overall, I believe change is good. Obama had overwhelming support, and a brilliant network/campaign; however, what was most impressive was the hope and positive discussions he was able to raise.
In the case of Interracial Relationships I believe there is a growing acceptance.
~~What has been accomplished most of all by this Historical Event
is a “lessening of fear” [The fear-factor politics did not go over well]..and a tremendous step forward in our journey as a people.
All the best, Lisa.
~x~Will
Cathouse Teri November 6th, 2008, 10:21 am
I believe this historical event will make many changes for the better. No telling how far reaching they will be.
Cathouse Teri´s last blog post..A Wretch Like Me
auntiegwen November 6th, 2008, 12:15 pm
America’s come a long way since Martin Luther King, hasn’t she ?
auntiegwen´s last blog post..Tag, I’m it
Honey November 6th, 2008, 1:36 pm
I think that an interesting gauge of how accepted interracial relationships are is by looking at which race the man or woman is. White women are much more likely to date black men then white men are to date black women. Perhaps this is part of the reason that black women are so upset when black men date white women…the white woman’s pool of potential dates has expanded dramatically, while the black woman’s hasn’t (because the vast majority of white men aren’t interested in her, even if she’s interested in them).
Honey´s last blog post..Help! My BF Won’t Use a Condom!
kira November 6th, 2008, 2:36 pm
I don’t know that the change in office will change the beliefs of those who believe interracial dating is a no no, especially not immediately. We have come a long way since MLK Jr. but look at how long it has taken change to occur and, furthermore, how much change has yet to occur.
No doubt, Obama is going to have a huge impact on our nation, now and in the distant future. He has already created a milestone by simply being elected. That in itself gives hope for a future of long awaited and needed change.
Politics aside, I believe and know that it is possible for someone to change their views on interracial dating. While I don’t come from a family that is or ever has been liable to disown me for dating someone with a different skin type, there was a time when I knew it would be frowned upon.
The turning point came several years ago when a family friend, just in her early twenties at the time, died of Leukemia. Her fiance, a black man, was sheerly devastated. After the funeral, I remember my mom telling me that she wanted me and my sister to know that if we ever chose an interracial relationship that we would more than have her blessing. For my mother, seeing D’s fiance at the funeral reaffirmed that we all feel, cry, and bleed no matter what our skin color.
Anonymous Coward November 6th, 2008, 2:37 pm
Most young people aren’t opposed to going out with an attractive person of a different color, race, ethnicity.
When they go out to the clubs and bars they seemingly self-segregate.
Some of that is based on the kind of experience they want to have (Frat Bar? Electronica Lounge? mega club with rap and R&B).
But some of that segregation isn’t so benign. Be it patrons who are turned off when they don’t see themselves represented in the line outside the club, or venue owners who want to cultivate a particular crowd.
lisaq November 7th, 2008, 6:53 am
I agree Will. He absolutely did instill hope…something we desperately needed. I also agree that there has been a great lessening of fear. Quite an impressive turn of events!
You’re right Cathouse Terri. We can only wait and see.
Oh yes Gwen. We’ve come a long way baby!
That’s a very good point Honey. I think you may have indeed hit upon the reason black women are so upset.
Thanks Kira! I can’t believe I had forgotten D’s funeral and the impact it had. So glad you reminded me.
I definitely believe young people are more open minded. It’s the same with gay & lesbian relationships. They didn’t grow up with the biases many of us did.
Lance November 7th, 2008, 11:16 am
I see it as more of a sign of the times than a catalyst for exploding interracial dating. It’s also helpful that there’s an information explosion (on the net) about dating/relationships that sort of de-mystifies dating outside of your race.
Lance´s last blog post..I Canvassed For Barack Obama On Election Day
bobby November 7th, 2008, 1:58 pm
Good question, so here are some thoughts.
“Many people, including yours truly, will tell you that, when choosing a potential partner, they don’t see color; they simply see a man. What is important is his character, his values, his personality.”
On the surface, I disagree. I think we all notice if the person is Asian, African American, Latin etc. I think you mean deeper than that and I agree. However, I’m not sure that seeing color is a good or bad thing. I mean some have a preference for another culture or color and specifically look for that in a partner. I agree though that it’s the PERSON we need to focus on
Read some of the blogs about politics and you’ll hear some of the most vile stuff one can hear. Nothing has changed for some, and for others, things are even worse now that Obama will be in charge. It’s all about ignorance.
Will much change towards bi-racial attitudes? The future will tell, but l like to say; let’s dare to hope
bobby´s last blog post..Threatened by other’s relationships.
SINgleGIRL November 7th, 2008, 11:50 pm
I think this is one of those cases where my personal experience puts me outside the normal range of experience. At 38 I’m not ‘young’ by this crowd’s standards, but I’ve always been an equal opportunity dater and have dated guys from most racial/ethnic backgrounds (and am actually least likely to pursue relationships with guys who have family backgrounds identical to mine). And I have cousins who’ve married people from other cultures and they’ve been welcomed into the family. But then, I’m from New York. Sure, there are racial and ethnic tensions here. Probably in ways that don’t exist in other places. But for the most part this is a pretty easy place to be an open dater. I feel pretty lucky about that and hope that that spirit spreads across the country. It’d suck to have my romantic choices limited by things like race and small-mindedness.
SINgleGIRL´s last blog post..Good Daters and Bad Daters, Part 1 – The Good
lisaq November 8th, 2008, 4:10 pm
I agree Lance. I think it’s probably more a sign of the times than anything.
Bobby, when I meet a man, I meet a man. Not an Asian man or a black man or a white man. Just a man. I don’t think now there’s an attractive black man anymore than I think now there’s an attractive blonde man or tall man. I just think now there’s an attractive man. I agree that ignorance keeps people from seeing the beauty of people and intensifies their racism causing them to spew all kinds of nasty stuff. For those people, sadly, nothing much will change unless, as you say, it deepens their hatred and intolerance. Hopefully, in the future, it will become less about race and more about people.
I definitely think you are lucky to be from where you’re from SINgle Girl. Being raised in the conservative, Republican midwest, I admit my attitudes have not always been so open. In fact, there are some in my family who would shudder if I brought home a black man. Not that that would stop me…just sayin’.
JAYNE July 21st, 2009, 10:14 am
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OptimusPrime January 9th, 2010, 9:29 pm
I don’t think it does any good to look at the race/gender of the person doing the interracial dating because that only tells you those 2 races/genders don’t want to be together. It is a serious error in reasoning to infer from that that black women want to date white men and are being rejected or that black men and white women marriage are exploding (I don’t believe they are according to statistics). Even though I did not vote for Obama for policy reasons, I realize people look at him as a transformative figure. However, real change doesn’t come because of symbols, it comes from changing hearts. I don’t think 1 election can change hearts on a wide scale nor do I believe it should.
OptimusPrime January 9th, 2010, 9:48 pm
Oh and also couldn’t resistance on the part of black people to interracial dating be for the same reason it is for many white people (even some of the commenters’ own relatives)—a desire not to “pollute the race” or beliefs in racial stereotypes (ex: all black men are bad…/…all white men are racists)