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How Do You Approach an Older Woman?
Kevin asks:
Hi there, I am sure that you get many messages like this. I am (late 20s) really into the mature women(late 30s - 40s) but I do not know how to approach them. Can you help me with this?
The answer lies in the reasons why older women are attracted to younger men.
Many older women who date and are attracted to younger men are attracted to specific things about them. Though many people are quick to think it’s all about the sex, that isn’t always the case.
First, many older women are attracted to the energy a younger man brings to the table. They love that younger men have a lot of energy and know how to have a good time. In my case, I find older men too serious and too concerned about their careers, their material things, and well…retirement.
I’m a firm believer that life is meant to be lived in the moment. Retirement will come one day and obviously we should plan for it, but that doesn’t mean we should be counting down just yet. There’s too much to miss today if we do that. Younger men get that and it’s very attractive.
The second thing is a generational thing I think. Older men can sometimes be threatened by a successful, independent woman. Younger men, not so much. They are completely comfortable with a woman who lives for herself, thinks for herself, and supports herself without needing a man. There’s a respect for accomplishment and independence.
And, of course, there’s the sex. While not necessarily a reason in itself, the sex is definitely a bonus. My ex-husband relied on the little blue pill; the men I’ve dated since not so much. ‘Nuff said.
So, from my point of view at least, a younger man wanting to date older women needs to embody these things. If you do and are comfortable and confident with yourself, you shouldn’t have any problems at all.
Approach them with respect, use humor, and let them see that you are having fun and enjoying life. All of that being said, if you’re serious about dating them and not just bagging a Cougar, you may need to reassure them of that.
Those of us who seriously date younger men, are offended by younger men trying to just get us into bed so they can add a Cougar to the notches in their bed posts.
Lance, from Honey & Lance, recently wrote a great post about older men who are looking to date younger women for Dad’s House that you might find helpful as well.
Though his tips are for those older men, there are some great tips that apply. Older women are looking for what Lance advices older men younger women are looking for. It’s much of what attracts us to them.
