Time Out!

A combination of a couple of things led to this post. First, I recently read Do You Need a Dating Time Out? on askdanandjennifer, and I had an experience with a guy I met online. I’m pretty sure he needs to read the same article.

I’m trying to be more proactive in my dating so I sent a guy I was interested in an email asking if he would be interested in meeting. He lives out of town so I asked if he ever made it to Mapdot. He replied that he would be in town the next evening and would that work. Feeling pretty proud of myself, I replied that it definitely would.

Next day, huge nasty storm. Welcome to Mapdot. He called and canceled but said he thought he would be in town the next night and would call me. No call. He waited until Sunday and then emailed saying he would be in town Tuesday and would that work for me. Sure, call me. No call.

A little pissed off, I changed my MySpace status to “really? again?” so he would be sure to see it and went to bed. I know, a little immature, but I was frustrated and needed him to know it one way or another. In my own defense, I’d have texted him but I don’t know if he even has texting.

The next morning I had an email saying he was sorry. Apparently his car ‘crapped out’ a few months ago and he’s been borrowing one since. He says he gets busy and doesn’t think to call. On top of that, his parting sentence was, “I’ll get up there sometime and i still have your number so when i am in town i’ll call and say hi..” Really? Maybe he shouldn’t bother. After all, it doesn’t really sound like he’s in a dating readiness position. In the Dating Time Out article, David Wygant reiterates that if you are too busy to date, you should probably not put yourself out there.

If your job is a little nuts right now, if you have a lot of other things going on, or maybe IF YOU DON’T HAVE TRANSPORTATION to get to a date, you may need a time out. Wygant says that what will happen is that you will lose the opportunity to nurture the connection and this possibly great person will quickly lose interest in you. He says they’ll be “out of your life before they even had the chance to be in your life.”

And can I just say amen! This guy just lost an opportunity. I lost interest the moment I read the email. If you don’t have time or the necessary ingredients to even take someone out a date, take yourself out of the game until you do. You’ll save a lot of people a lot of frustration and aggravation. Another one bites the dust kids!

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Posted by lisaq on Thursday, January 31st, 2008 and is filed under Featured. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.